This is from the Spring 2023 Issue 109 of the Tau
Good Communication as Part of our Communication Plan
By Diane F. Menditto, OFS National Vice Minister
As Catholics and Secular Franciscans, we are called to shape society and our Order’s future. We are called to be good communicators and users of the means of communication available to us.
When we hear the word “communication,” the first thing that probably comes to mind is media, that is, forms of communication with an “s.” Pope Francis mentioned this in his statement for the 2014 Communications Day when he said, ” …media can help us to feel closer to one another, creating a sense of the unity of the human family which can in turn inspire solidarity and serious efforts to ensure a more dignified life for all. Good communication helps us grow closer, to know one another better, and ultimately, to grow in unity.” But he goes on to make the following points:
- “The walls which divide us can be broken down only if we are prepared to listen and learn from one “
- “We need to resolve our differences through forms of dialogue which help us grow in understanding and mutual respect.”
- “A culture of encounter demands that we be ready not only to give, but also to “
(Message of Pope Francis for the 48th World Communications Day, June 2014
All the communications {media) in the world go to waste if we do not communicate who we are to others and seek to understand who they are.
How do we communicate? In the Later Rule, St. Francis inspires us, “/ counsel, admonish and exhort my brothers in the Lord Jesus Christ not to quarrel or argue or judge others when they go about in the world; 11but let them be meek, peaceful, modest, gentle, and humble (2 Tim 2:14), speaking courteously to everyone, as is becoming.” (The Later Rule: FA:ED, vol. 1, p. 102)
How we communicate makes a big difference, because true communication requires more than words. Start with an open heart. We should not prejudge what another person is going to say. People remember how we handle a situation and, justly or not, assume that the treatment they have seen us give to others in the past will be how we will treat them in the present.
Creating a supportive environment in our fraternities, our families, and our places of work begins with sharing our own story and listening to another person’s story. Once we start to share ourselves with our listeners, they become ready to hear what we say and feel comfortable sharing themselves.
Authentic communication for us as followers of Christ and St. Francis is how others encounter the person of Jesus through us. We should ask ourselves, “How would Jesus communicate with us if he were here now? How did he communicate with those he met here on earth? How did he show that he valued the identity of his listeners?” As we read Scripture, we find Jesus communicating with his disciples, with sinners, with those possessed by evil. He listened to everyone with great empathy. Think also about his physical contact with others: helping someone to stand up; touching eyes and ears with his saliva; realizing that healing power has gone out from him-it’s not always words!
Today, we are bombarded by media and people talking at us. We have stopped listening to each other in many ways, because communications often drown out communication! Overcoming this phenomenon should be one of our goals as Secular Franciscans. But how?
If we examine many of the difficulties we encounter in fraternity, family, and workplace, we will often find a lack of communication at the outset. Often, the issue is compounded by further misunderstanding because we don’t stop to understand where our brother or sister is coming from. Every person deserves our respect because they, like us, are human beings with the Spirit of God within them. We may not like what they are saying, but we are called to respect their dignity, so, we don’t demean or tear them down.
In our good communication toolbox, we find an excellent talk given by Fr. Eric Law, who spoke at the 2007 Quinquennial Congress. He used the acronym RESPECT to remind us of how we should communicate with one another. R: Take responsibility for what we say and feel without blaming others. E: Use “empathic listening,” meaning that we show the speaker that we are in tune with them and that they are valued and respected. S: Be sensitive to differences in communication styles. P: Ponder what you hear and feel before you speak. {Or before you send an email or make a post!) E: Examine your own assumptions and perceptions. C: Keep Confidentiality.
T: Trust ambiguity because we are not here to debate who is right or
wrong. Also, trust each other, and develop trust in your fraternity, family, and workplace.
We are called to demonstrate: simplicity-without pretense; poverty confidence in the Father; humility-the truth of what and who we are before God; minority-recognition that we are servants, not superiors; an abandonment to God-trusting in God’s unconditional love. (See FUN Manual: Vocations; Article 30.2 General Constitutions; and The Franciscan Journey)
If these characteristics are present in us, we will be able and willing to establish trust with our brothers and sisters. We become better communicators, because our respect for others makes us approachable. We are responsive; we keep our promises; we say what we mean, and we mean what we say. We are humble enough to admit our mistakes or admit that not everything we say is the last word. Sometimes a lack of flexibility {stubbornness) can lead to a lack of trust and lack of communication.
Once we know who we are and how we can get along well on a personal level, we are ready to share who we are with others through a good communications plan. Our national and regional websites provide a welcoming environment for our members and those searching to discern a vocation. We attract vocations because visitors can tell that we love our Order and one another just by looking at the websites. We know that our Facebook page is not a place to argue or say controversial things. We try to share the best of who we are and who Francis and Clare are through quotes, formation pieces, wonderful homilies, and excitement over milestones attained by our fraternities. We use Twitter as positive outreach to the public, not to argue or tear down others, but to build up. Among ourselves and publicly, we highlight articles from the TAU newsletter, another communications powerhouse. Local fraternities should follow the example of the National and Regional fraternities. Examine how you communicate with each other and come up with a local plan to spread the word.
You probably have many communications ideas that you would love to share with us. Please do!
We are listening!
Minister’s Messages – Archives
2023
Good Communication TAU_109_Sp_2023
Priorities Ministers Message TAU_108_win_23
2022
What A Difference Six Months Make TAU _107_fal_2022
Franciscan Jubilee – Minister’s Message TAU-USA Summer 2022
“Great Things Can Happen” – Minister’s Message Spring 2022
2021
- National Minister’s Message – “Who We Are” – TAU-USA Fall 2021
- Minister’s Message – “Chosen for Each Other” – TAU-USA Spring-Summer 2021
- Minister’s Message – “A Call to Prophetic Creativity” TAU-USA Winter 2020/2021
2020
2019
- National Minister’s Christmas Message -2019
- National Minister’s Message – TAU-USA Summer/Fall 2019
- OFS Mission Opportunity – To Assist Migrants and Refugees
- National Minister Message TAU-USA Spring 2019
- 2019 Easter Message from National Minister OFS
- Easter Messages From Our National and International Ministers
- Good Friday Collection for the Holy Land
2018
- September 2018 – Formation Visioning Workshop
- June 2018 – Our Jubilee Begins! (40th anniversary of our Rule)
- May 2018 – National Fraternity Elective Chapter
- May 2018 – Prepare for Pentecost!
- February 2018 – As Lent Begins
2017
- August 2017 – Contemplating the Cross and the Lent of St. Michael
- TAU-USA Spring 2017 – When Things are Out of Order
- June 2017 – Pentecost Message from International Minister
- June 2017 – Pentecost Message from National Minister
2016
2015
- Christmas 2015 – O Sweet Gift of Christmas!
- December 2015 – The Moment of Mercy
- Advent 2015 – Finding Joy in Our Littleness
2014
- October 2014 – Please Pray that Third Decade of the Rosary for our One Secular Franciscan Order and our Four Fraternities
- March 2014 – Another, Perhaps Lenten, Look at “Fair Share” With a Short and a Long Answer
- January 2014 – New Things for the New Year 2014: Temporary Suspension or Permanent Dismissal? Being the Merciful Presence of God
2013
2012
- October 2012 – National Minister’s Annual Report to the Order
- June 2012 – Please Join Us in Presence or in Prayer at the 2012 National Secular Franciscan Quinquennial Congress!
- March 2012 – I Thirst
- January 2012 – Gathered Around the Manger in 2012
2011
- September 2011 – Summer Vacations
- May 2011 – The Road to Emmaus
- March 2011 – The Beatitudes of Penance
- January 2011 – The Joy and Mystery of the Incarnation
2010
- December 2010 – Prepare the way of the Lord!
- August 2010 – The Heart of Our Faith is the Person of Jesus Christ
- June 2010 – Taking, Blessing, Breaking, Giving
- May 2010 – The Blessed Mother, St. Francis and All of Us
- April 2010 – The San Damiano Crucifix
- February 2010 – Brothers and Sisters of Penance
- January 2010 – Come and March for Life in Prayer