(This article originally appeared in the TAU-USA Summer 2025 Issue #116)
by Jane De-Rose Bamman, OFS
National Minister
Recently, a dog bit me. At our initial encounter, he seemed friendly but as he was passing me, he turned around to bite my leg. Not a nip – a real bite! I did nothing to provoke it. But who really knows … the dog didn’t give me a reason for the action.
That experience made me ponder our relationships, especially with our enemies. Although we don’t always recognize them at first, people who can harm us do exist.
Daily we pray: “… he promised of old that he would save us from our enemies, from the hands of all who hate us.” (Lk 1:70-71). Then in Matt 5:44, Jesus said “… love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you.”
These scripture passages challenge us to consider what an enemy is and who our enemies are. According to The American Heritage Dictionary, enemy comes from the Latin word inimicus which means “bad friend.”
Do I have any human enemies? Is there anyone in my family, fraternity, community or in the world, I view as an enemy or a bad friend? No one comes to mind. But I do avoid those whose actions irritate me or who are arrogant or rude. Enemies? Sort of.
Does an enemy need to know that they are considered an enemy to truly be one? Does it have to be mutual with each person hating the other? If it is just in my mind, does it meet the definition of an enemy?
Matt 5:44 calls us to love our enemies. In one case, I considered a former coworker, now a competitor, as an enemy. I harbored ill feelings because I felt the coworker had badmouthed my husband, Brian, and me. I did not want to be around that person at all. Instead of killing the relationship, it was time for me to apply Matt 5:44 – a work in progress. People of various cultures may be viewed as enemies because of differences or their impact on the environment. Neighbors may be considered enemies because of noise levels or unkept yards, harming your sense of peace and quiet or property value. Fraternity brothers or sisters may be thought of as enemies because they ask us to do something we don’t agree with, or we don’t feel we are treated with the respect we deserve. Am I willing to love my enemies and pray for those who persecute me – including family members? I am willing to try.
I have been guilty of assuming something about a perceived enemy and come to find out the person had no intent of harm at all. I just needed to get to know the person or the full story behind the circumstances.
The wisdom of the Gospel call to love our enemies is a prompt to be in relationship with these persons. Sometimes when coexisting you can see the benefits of another. Having a relationship with an enemy may actually turn that person into a friend.
Although I choose to try to apply Matt 5:44 instead of harboring ill will towards a “bad friend,” I will still be cautious with stray dogs in the neighborhood.
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